


Winter Nothing

by Twilight_Shadow_Songs



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-07
Updated: 2014-05-07
Packaged: 2018-01-23 22:51:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1582292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Twilight_Shadow_Songs/pseuds/Twilight_Shadow_Songs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You are Bucky Barnes undergoing re-education. Who's Bucky?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Winter Nothing

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CampionSayn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CampionSayn/gifts).



Sometimes memory is as strong as getting punched in the face; sometimes it’s as soft as the distant sound of a music box playing carnival music. Sometimes you crush your hand to your face and grimace the memory away, sometimes you just need to curl with your arms cradling your head and have a good long cry. The human mind was funny like that. Sometimes you want to push the memory away because it’s painful, like jagged glass being dragged down and through your arm. Sometimes, it’s something you cling to, because it’s soft as silk and gentle as a mother’s embrace. Sometimes, it makes you so very happy, and sometimes it makes you so very sad.

But these memories are _yours_ and regardless of what they make you feel or what they do to you, you want to cling to them as they are the only life-line in this place that is working on taking you out of yourself and making you a shell. Nobody’s coming to save you; they let you listen to the radio. Your friend is dead, and he was the only one who cared enough to want to come back and get you. Stay strong, try to survive, but you know it’s only a matter of time before they win and you lose whatever they’re trying to take away.

Maybe one of the more concerning things is that you seem to be developing holes in your memory. When did you get this new arm? Where did your actual arm go? You don’t know, you’re worried and try everything to remember but the fact that you just can’t seem to _terrifies you_. So you take to muttering things you know you can remember, things that are engrained into your soul. Your enlistment number, actually a draft but you’d never tell your friend because he so wanted to be in the army and if he knew it would break his heart. You repeat it, muttered numbers you barely notice start losing their meaning. 

Kicking and screaming doesn’t help, it only results in more punishment and your body is resembling a car-crash victim. Escape attempts are pretty much futile. From time to time you keep trying but eventually the desire to attempt and risk getting beaten and more tests is tortured out of you. It hurts. You whimper and cry because everything hurts. You can no longer remember what exactly happened the first time you were captured, but you know it wasn’t this bad. You want it to stop, to end, for someone to save you, but nobody will. You can’t even remember who it was that rescued you the first time, but you know you were close, and you know he’s gone. 

You are a docile creature, being led to the chair. It’s a new thing, they say it’ll be the thing that works this time. You don’t know what they mean but you somehow don’t care. If it works, there will be no more pain. No more, no more, no more…the thing is frightening though and you instinctively pull away as they drag you closer, ripping the tattered shirt over your head and replacement arm. You moan softly as you’re strapped into the seat and they force the bit into your mouth. There is _so much pain_ but you can’t scream with the bit in place. You try to remain conscious, but it’s useless. You black out.

There is nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. People are here. A man is in front of you. he smiles and there’s nothing. No memories, did you have any? What are you? The thoughts fragment before they fully form. “Hello, Bucky” You stare at him. What’s a Bucky, it can’t be you, you are nothing. The man grins wider. 

“Hello, Winter Soldier”

**Author's Note:**

> aahh CampionSayn has gifted me such pretty works and I felt I needed to give her a few back ^^ this one was going to be a surprise, and it is, but it turned out much sadder than I was going for...you give me fluff and I gave you angst, sorry! XD anyway, hope you enjoyed this little thing <3


End file.
